Miscellania

sometimes it’s best to explain the biggest things in the smallest words. sometimes even the biggest things can get lost in all those syllables. love is just another four letter word. but could you build anything bigger? While two year old teeth can carve it into the air and 87 year old gums can breathe it with the exhaust of so many times and so many tries. but for me it gets caught somewhere between the lump in my throat and my pride because i’m already tired from all the times that i’ve tried so If death is eternal sleep then bury me in piles of paper and send me down an ink river because lately I can’t rest without writing of you but you travel past my teeth and tongue like frozen smoke lining my lungs with ice and leaving my ears burning hot & I swear I could still trace out your figure in the dark until you were close enough and swallowed me whole suddenly drowning in you waking up underneath a layer of ice cubes and I gasp one cold hard breath of you and with my exhale  I...

First, a couple of disclosures: I do not claim to be a world renowned poet. I just love to do it. I do not claim to know everything. I'm just a kid. I write because I have to. It is in me and I can't go a day without it. OK, so I have been writing quite a bit lately. By that I mean I have been staring at about 7 or 8 open text edit windows with poems that have been lying in wait from anywhere from a week to 9 months. I have decided to jump-start my creative engine and finally break through all of these emotions I have been futally trying to articulate for months. I will do this by writing a poem based on a creative writing prompt daily. I will be using this  web site for my prompts. I will probably hand write them but maybe if I am feeling confident enough I will post one. Tonight I am going to continue to work towards polishing up any of these one stanza poems into something good but it's already 1:58am... I ordered a new journal! I can't wait to start us...

The purpose of an Om ring: " Fill your life with unity by understanding that every decision has an effect on your life." I was at the convenient store around the corner yesterday and I noticed the woman working the cash register had a diamon om ring. I immediately showed her mine. Her eyes went wide and she said, "You know what this is?! You know what Om is?" I told her I did. She said, "You know this is the sacred. You must not touch alcohol while wearing this ring!" I nodded and she motioned for me to come over to the side of the counter so she could look at my ring. I took it off and she held it in her hands and smiled.  "You are not Hindu... right?" She asked. "No, I'm not." "Do you practice yoga?" "Yes!" Then her husband laughed and said, "We must find you an Indian boyfriend! We will get you one!" I originally bought my Om ring to remind me of my connection to myself, my spi...

I had some frustrations I just couldn't shake today... So I brought them to my mat and simply left them there. Here's a shot from today's practice :) I did a lot of physical stuff today. Running, sprinting, Tennis, bike riding, and yoga! I have become a handstand expert! Ok maybe not an expert but I'm getting pretty good! I have scars and bruises on my body. I'm not afraid to physically get hurt. I've been running and falling and climbing and I have so much energy and so much life in me. I came to some substantial conclusions about a lot of what's been going on lately. I lost myself a little bit there. Of course as with any break up there's a hole where that love used to be. It's not a horribly deep hole with rough edges, it's just your average end of a period of my life kind of hole. And I'm not one to hide my failures. I tried to fill it. With stupid boys I didn't care about, with cigarettes and cloves and beer pong. I stuffed gr...

I am stretching and twitching out of my shell and am a mess of vulnerable, itching cells It's never easy and it's never fun it's strenuous, exhausting but it has to be done. xo -M

A conversation between two residents at the nursing home where I work. Resident one: farts Resident two: "You're an old fart." Both: laugh hysterically until they start coughing. :)

A couple of things that are on my mind... Loss is tough. Losing love is tough. Forcing someone else to experience the loss of love is tough. But it makes you tough. If you let it. You have to dig up those feelings and expose them to the searing sun and shattering rain. You have to let those feelings rot and decompose right there in the oxygen or the time it takes for them to return to the dust from which they once came will only be elongated. Sometimes it is easy to find who you are in someone else's reminding you. But then, when was the easy thing ever the right thing? My knees are rusted machinery now. My heels are heavier and every time my feet hit the pavement it is with the weight of what I've done & It is with the absence of what I haven't. I feel no regret or sadness, just the itching ache of growing pains and that's the whole point of this universe thing anyway. -m